A Very Octopus-ish Halloween!

I've never been a very crafty person. Don't get me wrong, I've tried. I have just never been that successful in my endeavors. Over the years I've dabbled in primitive painting, crochet, cross-stitch and scrap-booking. Nothing ever comes out like I think it should so my many unfinished projects usually end up tossed in a corner of my craft room (aka spare bedroom / office / official "junk drawer" of my home).

Even with all of my failed crafting adventures, I was determined to be the Mom that turned out fantastic homemade Halloween costumes! Let me just say, there is nothing wrong with store bought costumes (as an overwhelmed new Mom, I bought Mason's costume last year and it was adorable.) But there is something so rewarding in making something from scratch for my baby boy! (And of course the penny pincher part of me knew it would be a huge financial savings if I made it myself)  Knowing that I don't operate well under pressure (my poor husband has witnessed many of my stress-induced-tantrums over the years), I started combing Pinterest for ideas 11 weeks before Halloween. I wanted something warm, practical and topping the charts on the cuteness factor. And most importantly, I needed something that my domestically-challenged self could pull off! Along came the baby octopus.  Because seriously, what's cuter than a baby octopus? 

My consignment store find!

There were so many different ways to make this costume so after studying many blogs and patterns, I set off to my local children's consignment store. It was a bit difficult to find what I was looking for (seeing that it was the middle of August) but I finally found a fleece sleeper. This would be the base of the costume and the first 2 legs. The fantastic part of this find was it was only $2.50 and since I always have a rolling credit at this store from my own consignments, I walked away paying nothing.

I chose white, powder blue and navy t-shirts.

I cut 2 pieces of cloth in each color

Something inside of me clicked when I didn't have to pay for the sleeper. I started seeing this costume as a personal challenge to spend as little money as possible. So instead of hitting the fabric store next, I rummaged through my husband's old t-shirts and began cutting away. There was no real science to my measurements; I used the length and double the width (so I could fold the fabric in half) of a pair of Mason's pants and did a rough cutting job. I wasn't too worried about straight lines because octopus' tentacles aren't perfectly straight, right? After everything was cut, I folded the fabric (lengthwise) in half and pinned to keep everything together. Then I sewed up 2 of the remaining edges leaving 1 edge open to be stuffed.

My very imperfect stitching that no one can see!

Mission Mutilation of Pillow complete!

Once everything was sewn up, I turned it all inside out so all of my imperfect stitching was hidden (because truly, it was the most hideous sewing job you have ever seen!) I then slaughtered an unused pillow at my house (once again not spending a cent, woot woot) and used the stuffing to plump up the tentacles. Lastly, I stitched up the last end of each piece.

To make it easier to transport my baby octopus in the car, I made his back two tentacles detachable. (Can I get an AMEN for adhesive backed velcro?!?) The rest I sewed on. I then added some felt pieces and topped it off  with some googly eyes and I was finished! This took about 2 weeks' time to complete but mainly because I only worked on it during nap times... probably a good 10 hours of labor all together... and SO WORTH IT!

All done! (The two legs to the left, attach to his back)

Just a quick recap on the dough I shelled out to make this costume...
Sleeper: $0.00

Tenticles including stuffing: $0.00

Sewing supplies including velcro: $0.00 (Found it in my unused sewing basket!)

Felt and googly eyes: $3.00

Ya, that's right, I spent $3.00 on this costume! Pictures of my little guy in his costume to follow!

Dear 1-Year-Old Mason: Hooray For a Year of Firsts!

Dear 1-Year-Old Mason,

I am writing this love letter to you, as you sleep soundly only a few feet away. How can I explain the feelings that are swimming in my head? One year. How is it possible that one year of firsts have already flown by? One year of snuggles, smiles, kisses and tears. Your Daddy and I were there for every moment of your growth. No one else. It has been our biggest challenge but also our biggest accomplishment. Daddy gave your first (sponge) bath to you and changed your first diaper. Daddy was actually the champion of diaper changing as I was terrified to do it myself for your first two weeks! He never complained as some daddies do... he enjoyed every moment (even the poopy ones!) He is wonderful like that. He was awarded by getting to see you crawl and pull yourself up to a standing position for the first time! I was also blessed enough to experience my own handful of baby firsts. First smile and laugh. First time you sat up by yourself or stood up unassisted. I have never been more proud than when I watch you accomplish a new task! That's what was so great about your first year. Everything was new to you and everything was exciting for us to do with you!

First car ride! (What normally would have taken Mommy and Daddy 45 minutes to drive, this time, it took us close to an hour and a half. Everyone seemed to be driving far too "reckless" around our precious bundle that day!)

First Football Sunday!!!

First time eating carrots! Yum yum!

I should probably take this time and give you my apologies. In all of my excitement of your many firsts, I may have taken some "compromising photos" of you. Let me make it clear, that I am not sorry that I took them. (After all, it's only payback for all the sleepless nights you have given me!) But I am sorry for any embarrassment that I may cause you when these pictures resurface at your high school graduation party or when I meet your first serious girlfriend. Get used to it kid, I'm an out of control mama!

First Halloween!

First Election Day!

First Thanksgiving!

It's very surreal to have the first year behind us.  It seemed like just yesterday that I was inhaling your sweet baby smell as you slept on my chest for hours. Now, our snuggles have been shortened due to your constant need of motion but they are not any less sweet. You are the best thing that ever happened to your Daddy and I. When we found out you were a boy, your Daddy was OVER THE MOON. He wanted a boy so bad! Someone to take outside and get dirty with! I know if you had been a girl, he could have done all the same things with you but he had his HEAD SET on having a boy! And you are everything he dreamed of. You are his mini-me. When I was growing up, I assumed that I would have a girl (since I loved all the girly stuff like dolls and dress-up!) But how quickly my mind changed when I learned your gender. I immediately started thinking about trucks and Batman and everything else boy-driven. You were the little boy I never realized I wanted! Now my world is full of dirt and trucks and grunts and burps... and I love it! It's also filled with sweet kisses, hugs and loving touches.

You are such an amazing little boy! Sometimes I sit back and look at you and wonder how I gave birth to such a cool human being. You are such a kind soul. When we read books together, you give kisses to every animal and baby you find on the pages. I didn't teach you that. That is you in your purest form. I love watching how reflective you can be. When someone first meets you, you come off as being shy. But I know you're not. You just have to take in every new situation and surrounding. You drink it in and then you dive in head first!

I have so many things I want to teach to you but thankfully we have years ahead of us so here are just a few... For each month I've been blessed to know you:

1. Dance. Dance whenever you hear music. Dance when there is nothing to dance about. Music got me through the long days as a new Mom. When you wanted nothing else but to be held, we would sway to music and look out the window for your Daddy to arrive home from work. Now it brings me so much joy to see you bounce around to everything from Flo Rida to Alan Jackson. You have music in your heart sweet boy, never let it go.

 2. Give yourself to a cause. Find something that you care about. Move mountains and make a difference. Make the world a better place.

3. Be kind to animals. If you are kind to animals, they will be kind in return. Respect their strength and power and show them love. You will never meet a more loyal companion that a well-loved pet.

4. Have faith. Have faith in God, have faith in family, have faith in yourself. When life is hard, have faith that everything will work out. It always does.

5. Learn to cook. There will be a time in your life that you will be left to your own devices. Don't survive on soba and fast food. Learn to cook real meals. You will be thankful one day and your spouse will be too!

6. Play a sport... or don't. Your Daddy would like nothing more than for you to take after him and play baseball, football or basketball. That's awesome if you follow in his footsteps. (God knows you won't be inheriting any athleticism from your Mommy.) And if you choose to go an entirely different route, such as art or music.. that's awesome too. Or you can do both! Just know that whatever you choose to do, we will be proud of you.

 

7. Love with all your heart. If I learned anything from your Grandparents, it was to give yourself freely and fully in the name of love. I hope you will learn the same after watching your Daddy and I.

8. Laugh. Laugh until it hurts! Don't take life too seriously. We are only here for so long on this planet so enjoy every moment you can! Laugh at yourself, laugh at stupid jokes, and laugh at every situation (except funerals, please don't laugh during a funeral.)

9. Work for tomorrow but live for today. Work hard for what you want but don't forget why you were put on this earth. Make sure you enjoy your time here no matter what your future goals are. Save some money for a rainy day or for your dream home. But please blow some of that hard earned dough on meaningless crap! ... Because probably at the time it doesn't feel meaningless and that's all that matters. 

10. You are no better than anyone else and no one is better than you. Always give respect to those around you and expect the same in return. I don't care if you become a valet driver, a waiter, a surgeon or the President of the United States. All I care about is that you are respectful and kind to all walks of life. Do me proud kiddo.

11. Never forget family. Your family (especially ours) will drive you crazy! They are loud, they are opinionated and strong willed. But they love you. Friends and jobs will come and go in your lives. But your family will always be here. So show up to the family reunions, weddings, funerals and birthday parties.

12. Don't even try to understand how much I love you. You'll never know until you have a child of your own. Just know that when I'm following your school bus to school, giving you kisses in public places, crying at graduations and your wedding... it's because I love you more than I can ever explain in this letter. You are my world, my everything. Happy birthday my darling boy.

 

Today did not go as planned...

Today did not go as planned. Today was Mason's first birthday. When I heard him wake up, I knew I would walk into his room singing "Happy Birthday". I did that. I knew I would end the day in tears, reminiscing over my growing little boy. I did end my day in tears... but not for the reason I thought I would.

I planned on spending my whole day being Super Mom. I was going to try harder than I ever had before. If I didn't, Mason might not know how much I love him, right?!? I went into his room upon him awakening and sang "Happy Birthday". I was welcomed by a smiling boy reaching up for me! We did the usual diaper change and went out to the kitchen for breakfast. And so began our day. Breakfast has become a fight. Who wants to sit still long enough to fill our bellies? After what seemed like forever of me trying to coax my son to eat, I finally gave up and started "playtime". We played with all of his new toys that he got a few days ago at his birthday party until his Daddy rolled out of bed. IN WALKS THE ROCKSTAR! As soon as Mason spots him, Mommy is immediately forgotten about. He worships his Daddy. I guess I can't blame him. I married a pretty cool guy that has turned into a pretty cool Dad. And when I get teased by well meaning family members about how I have a Daddy's Boy, I laugh it off and say "can you blame him?" But the truth is, it hurts.

It hurts that I try so hard to be the apple in Mason's eye, and I seem to fall short. The rational side of myself knows the same thing that I'm sure my Mom knew. We are the ones that are with them day in and day out. We are the ones that give most of the baths, feed most of the meals, play most of the time. We are there...  all.the.time. As much as our little ones love us, we are "old news". They drink in all the Daddy-Time they can because they know we will be there when the day is done. That is what the rational side of me would say. But sometimes I get so tired, I forget to be rational.

My husband and I chose to have our vacation around Mason's birthday so we could spend tons of family time together. We had lunch together,and then spent the beautiful afternoon at the lake splashing around and picking up rocks and blades of grass. It was perfect. Between the naps and quality time outside, before I knew it the day was almost over. As my Dad was cooking dinner for us, Mason and I were playing on the floor in his new tent. We were both in there, being goofy and throwing balloons at each other. As I tickled him and heard his beautiful laugh, I thought to myself: this is perfect. And then the unexpected happened. As I was chasing him across the kitchen floor, I accidentally nudged him too hard and he took a nosedive into the linoleum. There was a moment of complete silence as my whole household froze and then the screaming began. I scooped up my poor sad boy and hugged him close. Don't worry, Mommy is here.  And after a few seconds of me rocking him in my arms, he spotted his Daddy and pushed away from me. He crawled over to him, sobbing hysterically until he reached his destination. Don't worry, Daddy's got you. And then my tears arrived.

As my husband sat on the floor holding my crying son, I began crying myself. In that moment, I was reminded that Daddy was #1. I was just the woman that pushed her son's face into the linoleum. It didn't matter that I cut out pasta, bread and ice cream for the last half of the my pregnancy due to gestational diabetes...It didn't matter that I spend every waking moment worrying about his well being, making his baby food from scratch or playing with him on the floor. At that moment, I felt like a failure. On the day of my son's first birthday, I sat on the kitchen floor sobbing like a child because I felt like I had failed at the one job that I care about in life.

The title of my blog is "Laughing My Way Through Mommyland"... Sometimes life is too hard to laugh. Sometimes you just have to cry a little bit. I cried because that's how much I truly love my son and care about our bond. But what I learned last night, was being a Mom isn't about how I feel sometimes. It isn't about how I thought parenthood would be. It's about Mason and what he needs. At that moment, he needed more than his Mom's embrace to make him feel better. He needed his Daddy and that's okay. So that's when I sucked it up. I excused myself and cried for a couple more minutes and then got over it. I had dinner with my family and continued to play with my son as if nothing had ever happened. Because he had already forgotten about his stumble and I should forget about mine.

So today did not go completely as planned. But it was a good day. My sweet boy awoke happy and went to sleep just as happy. I didn't sit down and write a letter to my "1-year-old" as I thought I would that night. My mind was elsewhere. I wrote this instead which, in the moment, I needed more. I will still write my love letter to him but he may be 1-year-and-3-days-old. That's okay. Parenthood is about bending and sometimes giving into the perfect image that we think we need to have. I've learned that tonight.

So now, my imperfect day is over. When Mason gave me his goodnight kisses in the darkness of his room, nothing else mattered in that moment. Our love spoke volumes.